Socialising

Training, Behaviour and Dog Sport all have their own section, so please post your question where you feel it is most appropriate.
User avatar
on-the-coast
Member
Posts: 468
Joined: 04 Apr 2010, 21:00
Location: NSW Australia
Contact:

Re: Socialising

Post by on-the-coast »

The edit function is gone.
I am getting really disheartened about owning a Schnauzer and trying to feed him, get him to the VET, protect him from ticks, from going astray, trying to train him and now train and socialise him.
I seem to get it wrong all the time.
And if I don't get it wrong with him, I get it wrong with the other dogs and possibly the other owners, because I don't read them well enough etc. or I don't communicate well enough.
Wow. I am over whelmed.....
1 Standard + 1 mini + 2 humans = a cocktail for a good life
http://www.rightnowyoga.blogspot.com
mookie&me

Re: Socialising

Post by mookie&me »

Astrid, please don't feel down... Some of the people on here have had dogs for years, and grew up with them, and some of us are on our first one (actually I'm on my 2nd, but only since Saturday (giggle) ).

It's a learning curve for us all, whatever our backgrounds, and no-one gets it right all the time. I wrapped my life round Mookie when she first came home, and when I was tired, emotional or feeling overwhelmed, she also picked up on that and was doubly trying.. They test us as part of their growing process.

What I'm trying to say is, you're not the only one who feels overwhelmed at the enormity of the task of dog ownership. Take comfort in the fact that

1. you WILL come out the other side and have a dog that enhances your life in the same way you enhance his
2. many dog owners never take as much care over the upbringing of their pooch as you do

Don't worry about reading dog language. Joni gave some good links in her post which you should browse through and enjoy the process of learning from, but you don't have to KNOW everything. No-one speaks 'dog' apart from dogs, but in time you will learn to read Schu's behaviour.

One more anecdote, not dog-related.

I used to study, live and work in China and on return to the UK I took a new boyfriend back to China on holiday as it means so much to me. He hated it. Why? He felt utterly lost and isolated. Not because he didn't understand the spoken language, but because he couldn't even read signs nor understand the different hand signals, tone and pitch of voice (a normal conversation sounds like an argument sometimes!) nor the cultural norms of the country. I came away depressed cos he didn't 'love' the country I did, but he felt isolated and cut off as he couldn't interact. I realised that even if you don't speak the language, in most countries you can communicate with people on some level when you spend a bit of time there. Otherwise, you can feel lost and low. What I'm saying is......... give yourself a bit of time to understand each other, you and Schuey, and then it won't matter that you don't speak the same language. What you're feeling right now is culture shock and you can't see anything but a wall between you. IT WILL HAPPEN!!! but it does take time...

Wow - that was a ramble.

Chin up Astrid! (clap)
User avatar
on-the-coast
Member
Posts: 468
Joined: 04 Apr 2010, 21:00
Location: NSW Australia
Contact:

Re: Socialising

Post by on-the-coast »

I can relate to what you say, Olivia
Thank you very much. Very. Very.
Astrid
1 Standard + 1 mini + 2 humans = a cocktail for a good life
http://www.rightnowyoga.blogspot.com
MattW
Member
Posts: 280
Joined: 03 Apr 2010, 11:46

Re: Socialising

Post by MattW »

Look up the 3 F's. Freeze - Flight - Fight. If a dog is off the lead it has all 3 options and most will use either choose option 1 or 2. If it is on the lead then it can choose option 1 or option 3. Normally the dog on the lead will freeze up but if the other dog doesn't give it space then it only has one more option.....Fight.

An important point to remember is not to pantic. You should be calm and assertive, if you get worked up that will just add to the tention.

We are all learning and no one will ever know everything about dogs. Take Ceasar Milan, most of his methods have been blown out of the water by science and studies proving that a dog is not a pack animal. Although some of his ideas are great especially as he tells people to exercise their dogs.

I have grown up with 3 / 4 dogs and now own 2 which will turn into 3 next year hopefully. I have studied dogs and trained them using both punishment and reward based methods. Sometimes I feel like why should I bother, they don't listen to me. During them times you feel like giving up. But then they do little things that remind you of why you keep dogs. I know I prefer the company of my two than anyone else.

Over the next ten years Schu will teach you as much as you will teach him.

Matt
mookie&me

Re: Socialising

Post by mookie&me »

Thanks Matt - I always think of the stress response as Flight or Fight - forgot Freeze. (bigthumbs)

Astrid, one other thing. Nicky (nickycaplan) has had some break-throughs with her Lola by ignoring her, and letting her go to Nicky for fuss/attention rather than the other way round (that's right, isn't it Nicky?). It might be worth moving through your day with your OWN purpose, rather than looking for clues and communication from your dog. That might start him looking to you for what to do rather than doing his own thing. Just a thought.
User avatar
Stacey100
Member
Posts: 1133
Joined: 15 Jun 2010, 10:41
Location: Nottingham

Re: Socialising

Post by Stacey100 »

I have had quite a good experience with the socialising of my pup, she was a very well balanced soul when I got her really which helped tremendously due to a good solid upbringing with her breeder before me, I have a slight blip in regard to her feeling the need to bark at other dogs she meets which I am getting control of now, this was brought on I think due to one incident one day at a local park when she was 4 months, a large dog rushed her, charged in to her, not meaning any harm but it frightened her so for a while she felt the need to be defensive when meeting other dogs but thet has improved lately although Schnauzers tend to be quite vocal dogs anyway.

My other dog wasn't as easy to socialise and still has anti-social tendancies, not in a bad way but he will not respect space and can make some incredible noises when he feels like it when he see's another dog on times.

I got him at approx 4 months and he had been withheld from leaving with the rest of the litter and kept separated from others so he missed out on that crucial stage of puppyhood when socialising matters the most, he's 10 now, so has calmed down considerably.

I would agree with other posters, that it is easier for some owners than others to interpret other dogs, if you are from a doggy background then handling dogs comes more naturally. My father is a Police Dog handler so I grew up around dogs and handling dogs so I find it easy to read other dogs that we meet and judge accordingly as well as be confident in my handling of my two.
If there are no dogs in Heaven,then when I die I want to go where they went.
We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.
User avatar
nickycaplan
Member
Posts: 2378
Joined: 27 Apr 2009, 14:28

Re: Socialising

Post by nickycaplan »

mookie&me wrote:Thanks Matt - I always think of the stress response as Flight or Fight - forgot Freeze. (bigthumbs)

Astrid, one other thing. Nicky (nickycaplan) has had some break-throughs with her Lola by ignoring her, and letting her go to Nicky for fuss/attention rather than the other way round (that's right, isn't it Nicky?). It might be worth moving through your day with your OWN purpose, rather than looking for clues and communication from your dog. That might start him looking to you for what to do rather than doing his own thing. Just a thought.
Astrid - what olivia has posted previously and above is excellent advice and I cant add to it more, other than yes, I wait for Lola to come to me now, she is a much more relaxed dog - especially on the lead, as she feels much more 'protected' by me - her issues are all fear related (thats another story!) - you sound like you put in 100% with your dog - pups are hard work and he will eventually not be as demanding - good luck and pat yourself on the back sometimes!! (kiss)
schnauzer lover...dog artist www.nickycaplan.com
dannie_kl

Re: Socialising

Post by dannie_kl »

Astrid dont be fooled by some of us who have mutliple dogs or you think our dogs are well behaved all the time (i think my post about my 3 dogs running off yesterday tells you its not always rosey) but when i starated trianing classes with freya-just under 8 weeks ago our trainer had just returned with a few others from teaching dogs to tracak rare turtles or something in vietnam where she told me about an exercise they did whereby the group of them had to try to teach or comunicate to another person whaat the wanted (i.e come over here and sit down, stay here, dont move) using just a £5 note! no voice and as minimal hand gestures as possible. WHY? even when we speak the same language if we dont make ourselves clear and demonstrate what we want we can get confused so think how a dog does. the reason my triner told me this is because Freya has always been taught to stand and be baited in the ring, until now she never knew what sit was and she didn't understand what i was asking her so there was no point losing my patience, i had to rethink how to show her what i wanted. freya does sit now-not always relibly mind but patience is getting there! keep going astrid and as for fleas/ticks/fedding and vets visits maybe your breeder could provide some support?
User avatar
Joni
Member
Posts: 1311
Joined: 21 Jan 2009, 20:06

Re: Socialising

Post by Joni »

There has been some brilliant posts here, which I have found realy helpful too. Dannie is right, often when we give advice, or in my case, it is when you have information on that subject, it does not mean people know everything - like on a lighter note - have you ever looked at my dogs haircuts - dreadful!

And we get loads of stuff wrong all of us, I have been for a walk with Riisini off here and thought a dog would be fine with Dylan and I let him off and he had a go and then Layla stuck the boot in aswell, I was mortified, but I knew he would not wound the dog, and it tought me something hopefully so that won't happen again. When I was with Mookie, with Dylan he lunged twice at her, once under a table - which I know that he does and it was my fault as I was too busy eating my sandwhich and the other time was over all the dogs trying to get the treats out my beg, a new situation for me, but we learn and all the dogs were fine.

You mentioned the squeal, that it often not as bad as it sounds, he is only telling the other dog it is too much, Monty did that with Layla for a week or so when he was a pup until they learnt, even my two do it if they are playing and one is doing it too hard, it is more likely to teach him stuff than scar him for life. All you want is for him not to be attacked - he will have a few scuff along the way (that is how I think anyhow)

Keep it up

One thing I do is re read my old posts when I am having a bad day (so I know them all off by heart now!!!!) it is a useful tip someone gave me as it helps you see how far you have come.

Joni xx
www.clontarfhotel.co.uk
www.mory.co.uk

For holidays in lovely Llandudno, North Wales!
Darwinsmum
Member
Posts: 3092
Joined: 06 Dec 2007, 06:39
Location: In my study

Re: Socialising

Post by Darwinsmum »

Dear Astrid lots of excellent posts, it has taken years for me to get where I am with reading dogs body language and training. Darwin still has issues and I manage them, it's not always easy whereas Mia is a completely different character. We all have good and bad days so you are not alone. Mookie&me has some good advice. Chin up.
Darwin and Mia 2 heatbeats at my feet
A life without dogs - I don't think so!
www.lincsdogtraining.co.uk
User avatar
on-the-coast
Member
Posts: 468
Joined: 04 Apr 2010, 21:00
Location: NSW Australia
Contact:

Re: Socialising

Post by on-the-coast »

O - how good to read the posts - O

(hypnotised) Guys, you make me feel better and nearly good even.... (hypnotised)

Yes, I do give that little animal all I can. It is not his fault that he ended up with me.
No....no .... I hear what you are saying and I do re-read the 'help with Schu' topic and I see Schu today, lying in the warming sun (it is winter here) outside the kitchen screen door -sleeping, while I cook and work in the house.... Good so good

The interactions with the outside dog world are tricky and I understand that I cannot control everything....

Thankyou .........................................
1 Standard + 1 mini + 2 humans = a cocktail for a good life
http://www.rightnowyoga.blogspot.com
User avatar
sugarbear
Member
Posts: 839
Joined: 04 Mar 2010, 14:27

Re: Socialising

Post by sugarbear »

Happy to hear... you give yourself a break. You are very hard on yourself you are doing wonderful.
My girls
sugarbear &
jasmine
dannie_kl

Re: Socialising

Post by dannie_kl »

its great to hear you a little more positive about yourself as a doggy mum and about schu's progress! keep up the positive attitude and schubert will pick up on this!
MattW
Member
Posts: 280
Joined: 03 Apr 2010, 11:46

Re: Socialising

Post by MattW »

If anyone is interested I have a pdf of a chapter from James O'Heare's book Aggressive behaviour in dogs. It covers some dog communication, visual signals, how to deal with aggression etc etc.

If you would like a read please pm me your email.
dannie_kl

Re: Socialising

Post by dannie_kl »

thats a nice offer matt!
Locked